No excuses

“Bloody hell, you’ve got an excuse for everything, don’t you?”

“Not an excuse, but maybe a reason.”

Peter Robinson, When the Music’s Over

Do you recall situations like this in your life? A parent, teacher or boss demands to know why something was or wasn’t done and when you explain you are told, “I don’t want any excuses.” But didn’t you just ask for one, you want to say (but wisely don’t).

Although both words are synonyms, we tend to think of a reason as the truth and an excuse as an embellishment, if not an outright lie. “The dog ate my homework” sounds like an excuse, when the reason is the pupil played after school, watched TV until bedtime and forgot all about the homework. “I have to wash my hair” sounds like an excuse, when the reason is the girl just doesn’t want to go out with that particular boy.

The reasons we have for things we do, desire, believe or whatever are not always pretty, or as pretty as we would like them to be. So we prettify them, turning them into excuses that we hope will be believed. Surprisingly, most of the time they are.

In a recent Shoe comic strip, the teacher says, “Skyler, I hope you have a good excuse for not turning in your homework.” Skyler replies, “That goes for both of us!”